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Saturday, July 20, 2013

Family Dynamics and My Promise to Myself

My mom makes me crazy! The only thing we've agreed on in my 36 years on this planet is we will never agree. As a child I would imagine that I had been adopted ... but I was so in love with my dad that I would dream up a scenario where he had an affair and I was only sort of adopted. I hoped my dad was my dad but that my mom had been some sandal wearing musician. Alas, my mom is my mom. She definitely drives me crazy, but I also love her in a way only a daughter can. I am protective of her, I am proud of her, and don't tell her this ... but I think she's one of the toughest ladies I know. She's the reason I'm stubborn, but she's also the reason I'm confident, musical, and positive.

Family dynamics such as this are hard to wrap our heads around. How can you love someone and yet being in the same room raises your blood pressure to near dangerous levels? Why is it that my best friend in second grade could beat up on her brother but when I kicked him in the shin she stopped talking to me for weeks? It hardly seems fair and quite frankly, it's not. Families love one another in ways that are indescribable. We forgive, we love, we laugh, we fight, and just when we think we've got it all figured out there's that curve ball that throws us completely off course.

Just yesterday evening my mom was involved in a car accident. She is at home healing and though her vehicle is totaled, her body will heal. This reminder was just what I needed. Life is fragile, relationships are fragile, and instead of focusing on what she does that makes me crazy, I should focus on the many many many things she does right. She will drop everything to help out with her grandchildren, she is a good friend and neighbor, and I know she loves me in the way only a mother can.

I make this promise to myself right here and now:

When I feel like throwing my hands in the air or rolling my eyes I will take a deep breath and remember that each frustrating moment is a gift.

now for you dear reader, I leave you with this:

May your paths be abundantly filled with lemons, sugar, sunshine, and family!

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