Bring On Lemons

Of course having a miscarriage changes you. Future pregnancies are marked with hesitation and a wee bit of fear mixed in with the joy. Until 2012, I had never heard of a missed-miscarriage. I thought if you weren't bleeding or cramping everything had to be okay. I was wrong. I will spare you the details (you can read about them here) , but I went in for my 12 week appointment and the heartbeat that had been there a few weeks prior had disappeared. That's when I learned about a missed-miscarriage. This morning, I'm preparing for my first OB appointment and I'm remembering all too well those feelings of loss and the fear we wouldn't have another baby. I'm wondering this morning: Do I feel as sick as I did yesterday? Does my mouth taste as metal-ee as it did a few days ago? I'm an over-thinker by nature, but a missed-miscarriage makes you even more of an over-thinker. I am gently reminded that God knows how I'm feeling and he knows not only all ...

As part of her WOW!Women on Writing book blog tour, I had the privilege to interview Shirley Melis. Feel free to check out the entire interview here at the WOW!Women on Writing Blog, the Muffin. I love how Shirley answered this question in particular; it really speaks to her character. Her goal was to leave behind some help for the rest of us - that we can thrive into old age. That message certainly rings true in her touching memoir. Keep reading to find out more... Interview Question: You had a plan to write a book about women thriving into old age – that plan changed course, but what spurred your initial plan? Answer by Shirley: Knowing I’d be in my sixties when I retired and wanting to write, I thought there’d be a market for a book like this. People today, especially women, can expect to live longer and healthier lives than their parents. Some may need role models. I like reading about women who are thriving mentally, emotionally, and physically despite growing older. Of c...

Delphine & her BFF Zoey So - I appreciate all the kind messages, texts, PM's and all the support concerning our recent pregnancy announcement. You are all just the neatest people EVER! And haters are gonna hate, but I'm not really concerned with what they think. I am however going to take a moment to explain WHY I choose to share so much with social media. It's not because I think I'm important. It's because I know what it feels like to be alone. I can tell you about 3 life-changing moments: 1) When I was 14, my mom got in a car accident and for several weeks didn't know who she was. She thought she was 18 and had no idea who my dad or I were. My dad had already been diagnosed with cancer and I knew he was going to die. I wrote a poem about how it would feel if my Dad were dead and my mom didn't know me. As an only child, it was a very "come to Jesus" time for me. I thought I'd end up in foster care or living on the streets. Luckily I...

Thank you to WOW! Women on Writing, guest blogger Educator Cathy Hansen, and Mari from Artotems as well as Shirley Melis. Without these amazing friends this lovely post would not be possible! Hugs, ~Crystal Banged-Up Heart: Dancing with Love and Loss Review by Cathy Hansen I have to start off with a straightforward confession: Memoirs are not my thing. That said, when friend asked me to read this book, I looked at the description, and I was intrigued by the description of a dramatic tale about remarrying after a spouse’s death only to lose one’s second spouse far too soon. Banged-Up Heart is definitely NOT your typical memoir. I found myself double-checking the cover during the first few chapters of the book, certain I’d picked up a sweet romance novel by mistake. The beginning of the book is charming and reads quickly, with Shirley’s chance meeting with John, as well as her first date since the loss of her first husband. There’s even a bit of comedy, as I read the d...

I kind of like doing things a little different than most. If you follow this blog, you likely know that already. We announced we are having another baby. This will be the LAST one as I'm closing in on 40 and I'll be the big Four Oh by the time baby gets here. Anyway - we made the announcement at our 2 year old's birthday party. She looks pretty happy about it, right? (keep in mind at 2, you'll smile about anything as long as you're having a good hair day and there's chocolate-cake a plenty) but seriously. there's lots of rule-breaking going on here: A) I've been told you should never announce something about one child at another child's special event B) I've been told you should never announce you are pregnant until you are out of the first trimester C) I've been told you shouldn't want a large family in today's economy and this day and age D) I've been told that getting pregnant at advanced maternal age is a bad idea ...

Thank you to WOW! Women on Writing, guest blogger Angela Williams, and Mari from Artotems as well as Shirley Melis. Without these amazing friends this lovely post would not be possible! Hugs, ~Crystal Banged-Up Heart: Dancing with Love and Loss Review by Angela Williams I was skeptical when I was asked to review the book Banged up Heart . It is not a type of book that I would normally pick up and read all on my own. I am a person that likes a good mystery or thriller. My attention has to be captured within the first few chapters or I will never pick up the book again. I am not a person that reads about love stories. That was immediately what I thought this book was going to be all about. At first, it was a little bit of a struggle to get myself to read it. I think that was because of my preconceived expectations. Before I knew it, I was done with the book. This book is more than just a love story. It is more about how two people can battle odds together and become clo...

Thank you to WOW! Women on Writing and Mari from Artotems as well as Shirley Melis. Without these amazing friends this lovely post would not be possible! Hugs, ~Crystal Banged-Up Heart: Dancing with Love and Loss Review by Crystal J. Casavant-Otto Banged-Up Heart is a great memoir for the non-memoir-loving reader. It reads like a novel. The only difference being you pretty much know the outcome before you crack the spine of the book. So what makes you want to read the book? Why would I recommend it and give it 5 stars? Well... Let me ask you this. Did you know Custer's Last Stand ended? Or better yet, have you ever visited Arlington Cemetery and looked at one of the really large ornate stones? Right there you have examples of knowing how something began and how something ended - but were you satisfied with that? Didn't you want to know more? After all, life isn't about the destination, it's about the journey. We all have a starting point and an endin...

same class - same instruction - look at the differences! ALL BEAUTIFUL! I just had a fabulous conversation with a friend. I was reminded of a time when a mentor asked me a tough question. A co-worker at the time (many many years ago) had done something I disagreed with. In my youth, I was quick to judge and readied myself to jump in and explain what they had done wrong and how they could do it better the next time. My mentor asked: Did they do it wrong, or did they just not do it 'Crystal's Way'? I sat back and thought about that. I thought about how my mother said you should vacuum first and dust later and how my father said dust first and vacuum later and how they were both right, as long as the work got done. It's the same way with parenting, marriage, book reviews, and just about any situation you can imagine. There's very seldom one single way to get something done. In my recent article for WOW!Women on Writing about book reviews for example I talk a...

Thank you to WOW! Women on Writing and Michelle DelPonte as well as Shirley Melis. Without these amazing friends this lovely post would not be possible! Hugs, ~Crystal Banged-Up Heart: Dancing with Love and Loss   Review by Michelle DelPonte I finished reading Shirley Melis’ Banged Up Heart a week ago and I still can’t get it out of my mind. It has changed my views on my work, faith, family, friends, and marriage. Shirley discusses her concerns with her husband’s medical treatment. As a healthcare worker, I failed to see the patients’ family’s view. I failed to see how scared they can be, as well as dependent. I never saw how their lives changed as their family member declined or passed on. I always feel that life is about quality, not quantity, but I see people suffer every day. Not a day has gone by that I have looked at any of my residents in the same light, no matter what they are going through. I have gained a better understanding and empathy for their fam...

Thank you to WOW! Women on Writing and the lovely Tara Forst as well as Rebecca Pott Fitton. Without these amazing friends this lovely post would not be possible! Hugs, ~Crystal Wave Rider: Poetic Journey from Abuse to Wholeness Review by Tara Forst While Wave Rider is not the type book I would normally read, I have found it very interesting and can see how others who have experienced abuse similar to what Rebecca Pott Fitton has gone through, would benefit from reading it. I even feel that my eyes were opened and I'm glad I stepped out of my comfort zone to give this a read. Rebecca has truly bared her soul in this book and I can clearly see her pain and healing. The early poems are dark and and raw and at times disjointed just as I imagine her childhood was. They make you feel for the lost little girl who suffered at the hands of her abuser and those who ignored her plight. As you continue to read you can feel the awakening and changing seasons of her life unt...

Hi! Many of you know me, but for those who don't, I've given birth to 5 beautiful children thus far and I'm not opposed to having more (good Lord willing and the creek don't rise). Right now, we have 4 children at home ages: 9,8,3, and 1. The 9 and 8 year old are 14 months apart which is apparently known as being 'Irish Twins' and the younger two are 17 months apart. I also take care of my niece who is 17 months younger than our youngest. (Our youngest will be 2 in a few weeks and our niece is 7 months). Now that you know more than you ever needed to, I am going to launch into all of the weird things strangers have asked and the snarky comments I've formulated in my head as a response: Are they ALL yours? (People have asked me this when I have just 3 of my own children...and of course if I have 5 in tow, then they still ask. I just politely smile and answer truthfully...but in my head, this is my snarky response: No - I rustled up all the neighborhood ...

Thank you to WOW! Women on Writing  as well as Rebecca Pott Fitton. Without these amazing friends, such tours would not be possible! Hugs, ~Crystal Wave Rider: Poetic Journey from Abuse to Wholeness Genre Spiritual Memoir / Poetry Amazon Link Goodreads Link About Wave Rider is a poetic reflection of author Rebecca Fitton’s long journey to heal from sexual abuse, abandonment, and neglect, building a new world based on wholeness of body, mind, and spirit. Her journey has taken a lifetime. To use the metaphor of waves, sometimes the undertow nearly drowned her—but she survived. Now her beautiful and profound book offers inspiration to others who have also suffered greatly from abuse. Praise "Rebecca’s journey, delightfully presented through her sacred poetry, resonates with an archetypal journey shared by many. The intimacy of her sharing and beautifully aligned prose guides us into a state of consciousness where peace can be found. Her book is a delicious de...