Bring On Lemons

On the afternoon of December 23, 2011, Judi Merriam's eighteen-year-old  son , Jenson, took his life - an act that blindsided everyone who knew him - changing her life and those of her family forever. The  suicide  of a loved one is devastating for those left behind and brings deep despair and seemingly endless grief. Judi was forced to confront profound feelings of loss and guilt and a future so very different from what she thought it would be. In this honest and soul-searching memoir, Judi reflects with grace and courage on the experience of living life after an unfathomable loss.      About the Author: Judi Merriam loves her roles as wife, mother, singer, actor, director, speaker, and writer. When these vocations allow her free time, she can be found hiking, swimming, sewing, reading, or watching British murder mysteries. Her most favorite people on earth are her husband, Brian, and her two living children, Tyler and Kalina. Judi makes her home in the hi...

The picture on the left was taken the day I brought my daughter home from the hospital. This picture hangs in our living room (and has for the last 6+ years) as a reminder of how small and precious she still is. It's our job as parents to point her in the right direction, remind her that she is beautiful smart and funny, and surround her with love. Sometimes I wonder if I'm too hard on the children. Am I too hard on them? Too hard on myself? Do I expect too much from others? I have plenty of these sorts of questions and not many answers. What I do know is this: once someone is gone it's too late to handle them with care and lavish them with love. Tonight I'm reeling from a phone call I received telling me someone had hung themselves but I'm not necessarily talking about absence by death. Once my children are in college, it's a little difficult to hold them on my lap and baking them some banana bread doesn't have quite the same effect as making it togethe...