Here I sit staring at the sun shining on Lake Michigan; I am undoubtably blessed beyond measure. That also is not the topic of today's article.
Today I want to tell you about my deep thoughts while mowing the lawn. Stick with me - it's better than it sounds initially.
A few years ago my friend Jim insisted we needed a zero turn mower at the church. I teased him that he had better stick around to drive it because I was the only other person who knew how and I was already the organist, janitor, and administrator at the church. Unfortunately, Jim is in Heaven now - well, I mean it's fortunate for him, unfortunate for me. I now mow the lawn at church. Don't tell anyone, I secretly love this job. I'm not a huge fan of the getting dirty part, but I love the sun on my shoulders, the music in my earbuds, and the alone time. I also love the way the lawn looks when I'm done - it's like a magic carpet!
This past Thursday as I was mowing I drove past the North side of the building and it was nothing special. I stopped for a moment and just stared. I've been attending this church for 42 years. This is where I've laughed and cried and when I'm inside, one of my favorite "jobs" is to go into the Sanctuary and turn on the lights and prepare for Divine Service. The sun streams through the stained glass windows and it creates so much beauty I'm often overcome with emotions. Yet, I guess I've never looked at the exterior wall. The stained glass actually appears to be nothing special. Even from a few feet away it's more of a muddy brown/grey and you can't make out the individual pieces or the art that it is. 
I made a few more passes with the mower (the entire job takes six hours alone) and the entire time I was thinking about those stained glass windows. Little fragments, joined together to form something that is only beautiful when the sun shines through it. Isn't that what we are too? Small fragments of varying size and color; life's experiences (good and bad) held together by something stronger than those individual moments. An artform that isn't fully experienced outwardly, but once you see the inside you realize the true beauty? When the SON shines through us we are fully realized and recognized?
Most days I feel pretty muddy grey/brown on the outside, don't you? The imperfections. The mistakes...the many mistakes... The things I could have done better or the things I should have done and didn't or didn't do and should have. A compilation of good days, bad days, long nights, tears, joys, all bound together to create something that is only beautiful to those who are willing to step inside.
I am going to leave you with those thoughts today and as always, I'd love to hear from you - so please leave a comment or reach out. I'd also like to invite you to visit me at Church the next time you find yourself in Two Rivers, Wisconsin. I'd love for you to see the beauty shown in this picture and experience the beauty of everything I love at Good Shepherd. We offer a Divine Service Wednesdays at 6:30pm and Sundays at 9:15am and you can find us online too on our youtube channel: https://youtube.com/@goodshepherdlutheranlcms?si=ojG_RpdHha9EN3hb
Now for today's questions:
*what do you look at differently as an adult that you maybe didn't appreciate in your youth?
*what is your favorite part of church?
*what do you do when you feel broken to help you shine again?
In case no one has told you yet today - THE WORLD IS A BETTER PLACE BECAUSE YOU ARE IN IT!
xoxox
Love,
Crystal
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